We all do it. We all talk to ourselves, all the waking hours, and then we dream about the things we’ve talked about, thought about, and see. We are spending these hours with a so-called expert – and that “expert” is you!  Now, while I am a firm believer in discovering our own Inner Wisdom, if you have had a consistent issue that is not resolving itself, perhaps taking a fresh perspective is in order – instead of trying to “work it” on your own.  Those “Aha Moments” will come, once you let go, at least a little bit!

SO, how about approaching life from the perspective of wanting a clean story-slate?  What I mean is moving from identifying with the story we tell about our lives (and our woes) to finding a fresh perspective. Isn’t it time? If you’re not sure, here are a couple of questions to ask yourself, honestly:

• Do I perseverate over certain things that annoy me? (in other words, do you obsessively think about things you can’t or won’t change)?

• Do you hear yourself repeating the same complaint?

• Do your friends’ eyes glaze over when you talk about “your issue?” (because you’ve said the same thing repeatedly)?

• Is there someone in your life (home, friend, work) who gets under your skin? A lot?

There’s no judgment here! I’ve done all the above, myself! That’s how I know that we let our “stories” live us, all too often. So, here are some tips to “changing your personal story.”

• Pay attention to your thoughts. This is huge. When you catch yourself worrying or thinking about the same issue, take a step back and look at it.  Thoughts have power and you are visualizing and setting intentions for things to remain exactly the same, if you keep thinking the same thoughts over and over again. Doesn’t that make sense?

• Give yourself a choice: 1) I’m going to do something about this or 2) If I’m not going to do something about this, then I’m going to stop obsessively thinking about it. This is truly very empowering! It’s a “take charge” moment which will fuel your confidence. When you allow worries to eat up your energy, you are at the mercy of your story, instead of being in charge of your life.

• Keep a journal! I know we’ve all heard this, but journaling about key issues can be very helpful. Keep it kind of freeform, letting your thoughts run without editing them. Then, after about a week, read what you’ve written. If you find yourself writing echos of the same things, it’s time to take change! This can be a very enlightening exercise.  The trick is not to edit as you write. Just write about what you’ve been thinking about, or what comes out naturally.

• Pay attention to what others are doing when you’re “telling your story” (assuming you catch yourself, which I hope you will now)! If they’re not quite engaged, then you’ve told them a variation of this too many times. They’re trying to be a good friend, but what we all need at these moments is a little tough love.

So, I’m gently pushing you: how much of your story lives you, instead of you living your life? If you’ve answered Yes! to any of the questions above, then I think it’s time to do a little mental housekeeping.

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