Before you read any further, I’d like you to write down the biggest issue that is creating the most anguish in your life right now.
No matter what you answered, I can almost guarantee where you’re going wrong: You’re focusing on the effect instead of the cause. Shifting your focus to “the cause” is the only way to alter “the effect.”
It’s time to plan the rest of your life…
There’s a universal law (like gravity) that says there is a natural cause and effect to everything. So, if you want to know how the brick landed on the ground in front of you, it doesn’t make sense to stare at the brick to wait for it to explain itself. You have to look at what caused it to fall.
As you know, focusing on what you don’t have is a worrisome situation. And you know the old saying, “worrying is like praying for what you don’t want?” Well, it’s true. Focusing on the effect or what you’re worried about is actually creating more of the same for you.
So, what’s the cause of the effect you’re so worried about?
It’s one of four things: It’s either your thoughts, belief system, habits or emotions. The best way to understand this is to do a few exercises.
Ask yourself:
- What negative or unhelpful thoughts am I having that are creating the effects I am experiencing. For example, “I can’t seem to make enough money.” “ I just don’t have enough time in the day.” When you focus on thoughts like that, you are really focusing on the effect. And remember, focusing on what you don’t want is creating more of what you don’t want! Instead, start to catch yourself when you’re having these kinds of thoughts. Say to yourself, “rewind” and instead, ask yourself, “What can I do differently that would change the effect of not having enough time or money, etc.”
- Are the habits you employ every day constructive (meaning they get you closer to your goal) or destructive (they keep you from your goal, like self-sabotage or not getting enough sleep?) Ask yourself how can you do things differently in order to get a different result? What new habits can you adopt or which should you drop in order to move closer to your goal? Some ideas might be: more sleep, exercise or better eating habits or calendaring and prioritizing your days. Changing one new behavior every two weeks can have a profound effect on your life. Don’t get overwhelmed, just pick one and create a new habit, then move on to the next.
- Where are your emotions tying you up in knots? If you don’t have enough time or money, how do you feel about that? Are you overwhelmed, stressed out, anxious or fearful? All of these feelings are “normal” but not helpful. Instead, try to literally feel differently about what it is you want to change. Acknowledge how you feel, then make a new decision as to how you will feel. You really can change the way you feel.
- What beliefs do you have about your ability to achieve your goals? While I’ve spoken about this in the past, it’s important to review it here, in this context. Your beliefs are really just a bunch of thoughts you repeatedly think, which create a connection in your brain that you call a belief. Seriously. How simple is that? It’s not magic or something mystical. You just took on beliefs from when you were a little kid, heaped a ton of evidence on top of it (because that’s what our brains do) which really reinforced it. You really do have control over your belief system, too. It might be time to review what your personal belief system could be. Do you really believe that you’re unworthy? Stupid? Too old or too young? All of these are false beliefs that exist only in your own mind. I don’t care if someone else projected their own fear onto you and told you that any of these were true…I’m here to tell you, they’re wrong! I suggest you rewrite your belief system according to the way you WANT to live your life!
You don’t have to take it all on at once! Pick one thing that speaks to you – No, pick the thing that screams out to you, “NO! don’t change that” and start there first! That is probably where your biggest breakthrough will come from.
So be brave! Look the causes in the face. Create a new plan (and effect) by changing one thing at a time. You have to be actively engaged in your new plan; Meaning, you’re not just hoping for a change.
I’ll leave you with this: You are the creator of your life. You get to choose what you think, feel (yes, I’m serious), which habits you employ and what belief system you want to buy into. It’s time to choose wisely. It’s time to plan for the rest of your life.
AFFIRMATION OF THE DAY:
Today, I choose one thought, habit, belief or emotion to face square in the face, and change. I decide that from today on, I will change the following: Fill in the blank!
