We all lead busy lives. No doubt. The problem with living busy lives is that we forget, sometimes, about the living part.

Part of living is in the everyday interaction. It’s seeing the person whose eyes you avoid as you walk down the street, or the waitress who served you, the person who refilled your water glass. It’s going to a networking meeting expecting to give rather than get. It’s telling someone you love them, just because.

Opening yourself to intimacy can make you feel vulnerable, if you choose to feel that. Or, it can simply be the human (and sacred) connection we all crave in a very digital, virtual 24/7 world. Remember, how you feel is a choice.

How do you find ways to connect with the sacredness in people you don’t know? And, why should you?

First, the latter: it is when you approach life this way that it becomes so much more enriching.  Life itself then invites collaboration, familiarity, rapport. This creates  an abundant, loving attitude which can literally change your experience of living.

How can you open yourself to others?

1. If you’re shy or scared, start small. Start making eye contact, reaching out to people you know you are comfortable with but haven’t seen in a long time. Thank the person who refilled your water glass, and look him or her in the eye when you do it. Hold the door for someone. If you can, say something good about another person (authentically – no BS here. Be real.)
2. Switch your attitude from get to give. When you approach the world with the intention of giving (not to the point of being taken advantage of, of course) the world tends to give back to you a sense of warmth and generosity. It becomes reciprocal.   When you trust that the world is a benevolent place, it usually shines for you in that way.
3. Practicing the abundance mentality is very helpful here.  When you put yourself in the flow of abundance, you are putting out a vibration of trust, strength and generosity that will flow back to you.
4. Think loving, confident thoughts. If you’re having trouble with this one, ask yourself, “What would a confident, directed woman do in this situation?” and do it. Changing your thought patterns creates a new emotion, which creates a new vibration that goes out and attracts that vibration right back into your life. You will act differently with a confident emotion of some kind. (Remembering that emotions motivate actions.)
5. Realize that there are varying degrees of intimacy. Obviously, you are not full-on intimate with everyone you meet, but you can allow yourself to be closer when you focus a little love in your heart. If it feels safe, also practice sharing a little vulnerable piece of yourself. More than likely you will be rewarded with support.
6. Think of everyone as your teacher. Even if something “negative” happens, you will absolutely have an experience that can teach you something if you allow it.
7. Expect a positive reaction, but if it doesn’t happen, remember that that person may be guarded. REMEMBER: What they say is about them, what you hear is about you.

Some caveats:

1. You do need to be aware and consider your surroundings. I do not mean you should air your deepest, darkest fears to everyone you meet (or make eye contact with dudes in a dark alley). Not only will this be inappropriate but it will keep you stuck in your “dark place” and you will find yourself investing in your “story” to get attention or stay there. The goal is connection here…not total vulnerability.
2. Create the intention that you will share when it feels safe and check in with your intuition. You really do know the answer to whether it is a good connection.
3. Remember sharing is great – listening is fantastic. A good listener creates connection. Everyone wants to be heard and seen.

Remember, we are spirits in physical bodies. So is everyone else on this planet. When we connect with people from that place, it’s kind of hard to take things personally or to live from a place of fear and lack.

When you connect with yourself as a spiritual being and see everyone else as a spiritual being, you realize we really are all connected. We just forgot. Creating intimate, sacred space allows us the opportunity to remember who we truly are.

AFFIRMATION of the WEEK

Today I look at everyone as my teacher. I interact with love and confidence, and know it will be reciprocated. I look for opportunities to be myself, to share and connect in a deep way. I am richly rewarded and allow myself to receive as much as I give.