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First Steps to Conquering Fear and Moving Forward

Phase I: Facing Judgment and Creating Awareness

non judgement day saying graphicYou’ve heard the phrase, “be here now.” While it has become quite over-used and sadly, clichéd, it does have enormous value. Be here now is more than just being present – which I’ve talked about before. Being present in this moment creates the future that you desire – as opposed to obsessing about the past or worrying about the future.

Today, let’s talk about judgment and the awareness of being here now. In addition to being present, being here now also implies that you are okay with where you are. No matter what, you are here, learning the lessons you asked for on some level. Being here now is loving your life. It is being in gratitude for what you DO have, not focusing on what you don’t have. It means passing no judgment (which is different than discernment) on where you are now.

I always talk about how we’re hard-wired to see what’s wrong and what needs to be changed, as this is part of our mammalian brain’s predisposition for survival. Learning to bypass that judgment is crucial to being here now. It is also crucial to, as Byron Katie says, “loving what is”. It’s frankly just easier to love what is! You can hate what is, or be angry about it, but is that going to change anything? Doing that will just attract more things to hate or be angry about.

And, this doesn’t mean you can’t, or shouldn’t, make changes in your life. It simply means it is the judgment that keeps you stuck.

Hating or being angry about what is is pure judgment. “Everything that happens to us as we journey toward the peaks of consciousness is necessary for our awakening,” says my Sacred Lodge sister, Karen Chrappa of A Structure for Spirit. I couldn’t agree more.

What motivates one to come into my classes or work one-on-one with me is often the desire to get somewhere or be somewhere else. That is normal. But the journey is the destination. Loving your life is the destination. When we realize that all aspects of ourselves and our experiences are to be loved, we step away from judgment into loving what is. That is the moment your subconscious and the Universe say, “Okay, cool. Let’s create more to love.” It’s that whole law of attraction thing!

Releasing judgment isn’t easy. I get that. Sometimes I live that struggle, too. There are days when it flows perfectly, and I release the judgment as soon as it shows up. There are other days when my buttons are pushed, and more than likely, I judge myself more harshly than anyone else – and that is a bit more difficult. But the trick is always awareness.

Awareness sheds light on everything: the judgments, the desires and what’s behind them (see last week’s post), the negative self-talk. Once you shine the light on those habitual responses, you let them go a bit more and a bit more. SO, judging where you are is the second biggest hindrance (behind fear) to ultimately having your heart’s desires.
What does it mean to have your heart’s desire? It is to realize that you are one with the Universe and with yourself – however you wish that to manifest and express for you personally. And that is your beautiful uniqueness!

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2 Responses to First Steps to Conquering Fear and Moving Forward

  1. Oh how I love the way you explain non judgment and present living. Reminds me of Pema Chodron’s work. “Loving what is” has really been one of the elements that I used as a child and then walked away from after much trauma. I’ve come back to that way of being now. Judging is a spiritual essence that can injure, I grew up a Christian and it clearly says in the bible, “Do not Judge” and for reason. I saw a lot of judging growing up in the church. Now of it turned out good. This post would help those people. Thanks Terri.

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